What’s in a Name?

I spoke to my attorney Tuesday and gave him the name under which I’d like to register my LLC, Words From A Wicked Woman. He saw it and said that I should think of another name. Puzzled in the extreme, I incredulously asked why. He told me that the secretary of state may think it’s suggestive because it brought to mind porn, prostitutes and something out of the web’s “Red light district.” (That’s what I call it, anyway.)

I was astounded. In all the years I’ve been writing as The Wicked Woman, no one has ever suggested that understanding. Of course, once he explained it, I could see why some horny toad of a man could reach that conclusion, but that’s not on me. That’s on the horny toad of a man. Nevertheless, I have to admit that my attorney has a good point. The problem is that I’ve been promoting that brand since 2007. I honestly have nothing to replace it.

There is no doubt about it: This recent turn of events just plain sucks. I feel like a muslim woman in a hijab because, heaven forbid, some random man might decide to attack her in feverish lust should he see an ankle. Truthfully, my response was more like, “F*ck!”

Well, I decided to try thinking about my target demo and how I’d describe them. All I came up with are names that are stupid for the name of an online magazine, arrogant, difficult to remember or already taken. Of the ones already taken, my favorite is “Lilith.” I’m sure you can guess the problem with that one. I can see myself in court already trying to defend that trademark and having a judge decide that I am in the wrong. I’m almost tempted to name it “Not For Men.” Huh. That is rather provocative, isn’t it? And I’ve never been opposed to rocking the boat when need be. Maybe there’s something in that.

I am open to suggestions. I know that very few people even know this blog exists, but that’s OK with me. I’ve purposely not publicized it. Hence, if no one knows it’s here, that’s intentional. I only wish that I’d remembered to never post on Fridays because I wrote a really good article on the Obama campaign, “Obama and The Gekko,” but posted it last Friday afternoon. I haven’t had such a miniscule readership on one article in nearly a year! It’s embarrassing, especially since I did go on Twitter and mention it about half a dozen times.
One of my biggest problems is that I can’t tell anyone, more or less, anything about the forthcoming magazine until it’s registered, I’ve got a business plan in place and it’s close to going live. Journalism is a cutthroat business. I’ve had pieces of articles stolen from me by competitors, but the publication for which I wrote the articles didn’t have the money for a protracted legal battle. Therefore, I’m keeping everything very close to the vest.

I will, however, offer this much:

My primary target audience is lesbians and bisexual women 35-54 w/incomes >= $100K. My secondary target audience is straight women 35+ w/incomes >=$100K. That’s all I can say and I’m not really even comfortable saying this much. However, if someone is to come up with a name, this is something they’d need to know. My e-mail address is found elsewhere on this site. On top of that, I will even open comments.

I guess I or someone else will come up with an alternative somehow. It will, however, never be as good as the original. And, there is still the possibility that the secretary of state will accept it. Then again, my attorney is a white, Jewish man in his 70s. He can think of things I can’t and he isn’t called a “bastard” for nothing. *smirk* I’m just glad he’s on my side. Actually, that is why he’s on my side. I needed a gruff bastard of an attorney and I am not at all distressed about it. OK, he didn’t have to call me at 9 a.m. to come to his office even if I didn’t get the message until 2 p.m. I needed the rest! I’ve started a cold and I’m having bouts of insomnia again. I need my sleep, damnit. But, if that’s the only thing that’s bothered me, I consider myself lucky. In addition, he’s goooooood! Yep, this is the best money I’ve ever spent. It will take the rest of my life to pay him off, but damn, is he good! I think I’ll keep him even though he threw a big, fat monkey wrench into my plans. After all, he was only doing his job.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s